"Ningas-kugon"

It's a phrase which relates to a situation where one wants to do something or has a set goal; this person is very excited to do it at the start, but as time goes by and the enthusiasm burns down, the person loses motivation; the work is left unfinished.

To clarify this statement even more—as I know it's hard to understand the first time around—let me give you a common situation but in the dilemma of an author:

While sitting on a bench out in the open, or while drinking a frappe in Starbucks, an great idea comes to your head. You keep it in there for further notice. Then as the days go by, the ideas start filling up your head; and when you know you've had enough, you start putting the pieces together like a puzzle.

After a few sessions of thought organisation, you have the finished piece. It's story you have and really want to write and get started with.

You pull out your laptop or a piece of pepper and start writing whatever comes to your mind first. You follow this workout for a couple of days or even two to three weeks if you're that determined.

But as the words flow and time passes, you're out of ideas and don't know what to do anymore. You get writer's block. Suddenly, you notice how much the sun shines brighter at noon and how the flowers smell in your garden. You try to think of ways to distract you until you've totally forgotten about your novel.

And in the end, it will just be a document filed in your computer, waiting to be opened. You will not open it for the next years or so; because once you've forgotten all about it, new ideas start coming to your mind.

It's all a cycle. You get the idea. Puzzle it. Start working on it. You lose enthusiasm. You lose ideas. You get distracted. You forget about it. And it starts all over again.

In the end, when you've decided to spring clean all your files, you'll notice the hundreds of documents and files of unfinished novels.

And you'll say to yourself, "What have I done? Why couldn't I finish them when I had the chance?" You won't be able to go back anymore because you're too busy with other things in your life. You'll regret not finishing them until your dying breath. (sorry for causing that mental image in your mind.)

(Here's a kitten to take the image away)

That's exactly what I've been avoiding. For the past weeks, you haven't heard so much as a fly noise from me. And that's because I've been trying to avoid Ningas-kugon. And surprisingly, I'm succeeding. 

I started a novel last year but wasn't able to finish it. I started a new one at the start of April and I'm determined not to make the same mistake again. I don't want any regrets.

If you're curious, I already have 50,000 words, which already sums up a whole novel. But sadly, I'm only on the verge of finishing Part 1. So looking at where this is going, I still have a long trip to the end sentence. (Wish me the best of luck.)

I'll try my best to keep up with my blog even with my hectic schedule. Because even if I don't want to leave my novel unfinished, I don't want to abandon this blog either, especially when it's just beginning. It will also be Ningas-kugon if I started this blog with a hitch only to leave it after my third post.

So hopefully, you'll be seeing a lot of me this year. :)

Finish what you started and

don't make any regrets.

Go back to those old projects while

you still have time.

Try your best to finish everything and

keep and organised schedule.

Begin big, end big,

live an extraordinary life.

- (asayoungwriter) Bryanna

Life is Happening Now

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risk |rɪsk|

• something man is afraid to take

• a deceiving little thing that indicates all the vain possibilities of danger: creeping into man's mind, manipulating it, and hindering man to live

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For the lot of the time I've been living, a question always seems to enter my mind, without my subconscious knowing it. It's a question that's been crawling into the very walls of my brain, screaming its message aloud; its voice echoing through my head, not willing to stop. That question, my friends, is the very famous, "What if?"

Starting Day 1, I've always been the "scaredy cat," the one who hates taking any risks. Heck, my younger sister is even braver than me. She's not scared of almost anything. Almost. And that's saying something, seeing the fact that she's five years younger. I've been called a "chicken" by her every time we go to some amusement park where there's tons of cool rides. I'm starting to get annoyed, but that's not bothers me the most.

I commonly hear people say, "Live your life now," but only recently did I understand what they truly meant. Life is about taking risks,  going out of your comfort zone, and living like there's no tomorrow. 

We all have dreams, don't we? And in the process of making those dreams come true, we have risks. If we aren't willing to face the dangers that may come our way, then how do we expect our dreams to come true? We shouldn't stay and wait for things to happen. 

Waiting shouldn't become a habit of ours, because if we continue to wait, what will we accomplish in our lives? Nothing. If we wait until we're ready, we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives. Life is happening now. And we should go along with it, not stay in the same place forevermore.

What we want isn't always going to appear before us in a flick of a finger. We don't have fairy godmothers who will grant our every wish. If we want something, we do it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. That's the end of it.

In life, so far, the only regrets I have are the risks I wasn't willing to take. I became too relaxed with my comfort zone and carelessly forgot the enthralling feeling of danger and risk. I forgot the need to balance things in life, just like Yin and Yang. Balancing the ease and danger in my life.

Most of the time, I too easily doubt myself with the things I can do, and end up wondering, "What would have I done, if I knew I couldn't fail?" I've risked things too small this year, and from now on, I need to start failing big and stop running from my fears.

     

From my week-long vacation to Hong Kong, I've learned so many things that have inspired this post. When we went to Disneyland, fear was quickly taking over me as I saw the thrilling rides. But in the end, I rode them anyway and found out that they're not as scary as they look. Super fun, actually. Those experiences will forever be irreplaceable, and that's what matters.

My life finally made a great turn, when I left my comfort zone. 

I was given a chance to take the risk, I took it, and that's what's important. Taking the chance. All the limits from my past regrets were all self imposed, that's what angers me the most. But of course, we all have our limits, especially the really scary rides I decided not to go on during my vacation. And I don't really regret not doing it. But alas, chances and limits are a whole another story.

I've turned my life in a different direction, and I'm not looking back now. It's a risk to love, and a risk to dream, but I do them anyway. My life in now set for new adventures, new discoveries. All of which have risks I'll be willing to take. I'll have no more regrets. After all, what's the use of looking back now?

Take risks.

Live your life.

You have the power to chose:

 whether to stay in your comfort zone,

or go out and explore the world.

Fulfil your dreams.

Don't wait 'till you're ready.

Don't have regrets.

Balance things in life.

Don't be afraid.

Make experiences.

Take the chances,

but always limit yourself.

Fail big, fail good.

Dream and love,

live an extraordinary life.

- (asayoungwriter) Bryanna

Closing the Door to the Past, Opening the Door to the Future

I've been thinking a lot about what I want to do with my life, lately. I'm glad for the little moments where I get to just sit and think, try and look at how my life is, enjoy the wonders of my surroundings.

I want to make a difference in this world. I mean, who doesn't. I want to make my mark, I want to be alive even after I'm dead. But how can I do that? I'm just an ordinary girl, living an ordinary life. No, that's not who I am. That's who I was.

As I close the door of my ordinary life in the past, I open a new one that leads me to an extraordinary life in the future. This is where I start to make my mark. My first step on the stepping stones leading to greatness.

Leaving my past mistakes behind, and all the bad things along with it, will probably be one of the best decisions I ever make. 

But I am not simply starting a new beginning, no. No one can begin again. I am simply making a newfound ending.

When I flip to the next page of my life, to its new chapter, and begin to rewrite my future, I want to make sure that everyday is the perfect day to be exactly who I want to be. I have the power to shape my own destiny, but with power, comes great responsibility. I'll make sure my destiny, is what I wish it to be, what's best for me, and most of all, what God wills it to be.

This year, I hope to do something so great, it will be one of my greatest memories in the future. Which is a real challenge, seeing that I have so many of them sitting around in the great meadow that is my head. I want to do something that will change my life forever. And hopefully, change other people's lives as well. However, I will restrain myself from going all extravagant and start small.

My wish to do something so great, will definitely result in many obstacles in the future. But why wait for tomorrow when you can do it today, yes? And even if I want all these things to happen, yet do not act upon it, nothing will happen. 

So I decide to start now. This blog will be proof, and a remembrance of all my memories—the various individual journeys I take on the road to accomplish my goal. And hopefully, at the end of this year, when I have achieved what I desire, may I be able to look back at those memories and remember them with such content.

You have the power to shape your destiny.

You chose whether or not you make your mark.

You get to chose to close the door of the past,

open the door to the future,

or stay where you are 

and live your life as it already is.

Do you want to live an ordinary life?

Or an extraordinary one?

- (asayoungwriter) Bryanna